Lying in bed last night, I started thinking about The Guardian competition. I wondered why some people didn't make the shortlist. In a couple of cases, the possible reasons seemed obvious.

I wanted to say to him: you're so talented at such-and-such, why fill your site with the other padding? I wanted to say to her: enough of the this-and-that, already. I wanted to tell him: stop taking it so seriously. I wanted to tell him: do you have any idea how good you are?

This led me to what seemed - in my half-sleep - a genius idea:



This is, of course, a take on the BBC's What Not To Wear. You - or your 'friends' - nominate your blog for a style check from blogworld's style guru [me, of course]. I turn into Trinny [remember: Trinny is skinny] and give your blog the once-over, really letting you know where you're going wrong, and where you're going right. In turn, you become Susannah, letting me know exactly what works, and what doesn't, on my site; what you wish I would do more of, what you wish I would shut the fuck up about, right now.

After that, of course, we'd probably hate each other.

Do we have any volunteers? E-mail me.