Fake tan. How does it work? Does it actually stimulate the pigments [mellanin?] in your skin that cause tanning? Or is it simply a dye?

The lotion itself is white. I know this because I shall confess to buying some just before we left for Sitges. I was determined not to be the whitest person on the beach this year. When we were in Sitges two years ago, the drinks seller used to shout out "¡Ola, Blanquito!" each time he saw me.

The fake tan I used didn't have much effect. Is this related to the fact I don't tan easily? Or did I just buy a crap product?

[Fortunately, I was saved from being the palest person on the beach this year by an almost transparent Icelandic boy. He was the only literally white person I have ever seen.]