I continued my I-wanna-live-like-common-people thread this morning by eating a bacon sarnie smothered in brown sauce while reading The Sun in the canteen. And I learned so much:

Madonna has written a song for Kylie, and Kylie has written a song for Atomic Kitten. This trend of pop stars writing songs for acts who are one step below them on the ladder of coolness should continue. Coming over all Mystic Meg [as opposed to coming all over Mystic Meg] I predict that Atomic Kitten will write a song for Billie Piper. Mrs Evans will pen a song for 3SL. They will offer a song to Cathy Dennis, who will write a song with the bloke from Mud and offer it to Kylie.

Also in today's Sun, but not online sadly, are three pages of The UK's Sexiest Workmen. I came all over the butch plumber [as opposed to coming over all butch].