High drama down the quiz last night. No, we didn't win, and nor did we lose. The pub burned down. Well, nearly. Perhaps Wendy's inclusion of Ash's "Burn Baby Baby" was a mistake.

At the end of the questions, the smell of burning filtered through the bar, and it seemed to be coming from the sofa we were sitting on. Me, Jonathan, Guy and Neil took cover at the far end of the pub as Wendy thoroughly doused the sofa (and our pints) with a fire extinguisher. But then, halfway through the answers, it became clear that the smell of burning hadn't gone and was in fact getting stronger, so the quiz was abandoned, and everyone was herded out of the pub.

Five minutes later, the fire engines arrived. Not one, not two, but three fire engines disgorged about twenty uniformed men, who had to make their way through the phalanx of whooping queers. Retro Bar regulars may be indie queens, but they're queens, nonetheless.

There are those less charitable folk who would suggest that the fact that the fire started in our area is not entirely unrelated to the fact we weren't doing all that well in the quiz. But I'd be careful what you say if I were you.