As the New Scientist says, "Coughs and sneezes spread diseases, but what about farts?" An Australian scientist got her eight-year-old son to fart, pants down, on a blood agar plate (bacterial growth medium) from a distance of five centimeters. Upon overnight incubation the plate showed growth of mixed skin and enteric bacteria. Most notable was the concentration of enteric [gut] bacteria in the "initial blast zone" at the centre of the plate, surrounded by the mixed skin and enteric bacteria located in the "splatter ring" around the "initial blast zone". Conclusion, don't situate an unprotected face within five centimeters of an unsheathed flatulent anus. See the results.