I am in Marcus's kitchen, using his laptop. He is in his bedroom, playing Klonoa 2 on the PlayStation. I have no idea what it's all about, so I'll make up a plot based on its Tchaikovsky-lite soundtrack. I'm guessing that it's set in Russia; he is being set upon by mad whirling monks on springs, while high-kicking circus clowns attack him en masse. Now he is very drunk and having a conversation with a five-year-old blue midget. Church bells are ringing, I'm imagining a snow-bound Moscow, lovers ice-skating on a frozen pond. Oh, hang on, the annoying midget is back, and he can't skate. Now the music swells in a grand climax and he is dashing around excitedly, eating hundreds of pep pills. Now comes the inevitable come-down, as he falls into a series of dark caves, battling glowing green spiders in a torrential downpour.

I've just popped in to see what is actually going on: I was quite close. Klonoa is a blue midget, and when I went in, he was indeed in a series of dark caves, in the rain. No glowing spiders, but lots of glowing green diamonds. I completely failed to imagine the giant puffin he was riding, though.