Note: Lavatorial, faintly pornographic illustration lurks just below the bottom of your screen - make sure your colleagues aren't looking at your monitor before you scroll down!

Do you doodle when you're on the phone? Often, after a particularly long call, I'll find that the pice of paper in front of me is covered with the name of the person I've been speaking to, or my own signature, or some seemingly meaningless word, repeated over and over, underlined or boxed. When I was a teenager, I used to think I drew eyes really well, and would fill the margins of my school books with eyes - usually Debbie Harry eyes - until I read in one of my mum's mags that doodling eyes was a sure sign of paranoia. So then I worried that people would think I was paranoid...

Anyway, occasionally, my doodles take a life of their own and become proper drawings, almost without my noticing. I'll be scribbling away and, an hour later, I'll look down and, as if by magic, there's a complete picture. On Monday night, while watching dull telly [Buzzcocks, Coupling] I found that I had drawn this picture of Sophie Ellis-Bextor meeting a stop sign:


Last night, while watching 24-Hour Party People, I came up with this masterpiece: