The BBC website has a Pass Notes-style column called e-cyclopedia, dealing with zeitgeisty words.

bargepole: n, the thing with which one wouldn't touch; something deeply unpleasant.

SUCH AS: some state secondary schools, according to Estelle Morris, Education Secretary. Quoth she: "I know that all secondary schools are not identical. As a teacher, I go into some schools and think 'I would like to work here' but there are some I wouldn't touch with a bargepole."

The e-cyclopedia has also gathered 141 words for 'drunk':

Ankled, Badgered, Banjaxed, Battered, Befuggered, Bernard Langered, Bladdered, Blasted, Blathered, Bleezin, Blitzed, Blootered, Blottoed, Bluttered, Boogaloo, Brahms & Liszt, Buckled, Burlin, Cabbaged, Chevy Chased, Clobbered, Decimated, Dot Cottoned, Druck-steaming, Drunk as a Lord, Drunk as a skunk, Etched, Fecked, Fleemered, Four to the floor, Gatted, Goosed, Got my beer goggles on, Guttered, Had a couple of shickers, Hammer-blowed, Hammered, Hanging, Having the whirlygigs, Howling, Inebriated, Intoxicated, Jahalered, Jaiked up, Jan'd - abbrev for Jan Hammered, Jaxied, Jeremied, Jolly, Kaned, Lagged up, Lamped, Langered, Laroped, Lashed, Leathered, Legless, Liquored up, Locked, Locked out of your mind, Loo la, Mad wey it, Mandoo-ed, Mangled, Manky, Mashed, Meff'd, Merl Haggard, Merry, Minced, Ming-ho, Minging, Moired, Monged, Monkey-full, Mottled, Mullered. Newcastled, Nicely irrigated with horizontal lubricant, Off me pickle, Off me trolley, On a campaign, Out of it, Out yer tree, Paggered, Palintoshed, Paraletic, Peelywally, Peevied, Pickled, Pie-eyed, Pished, Plastered, Poleaxed, Pollatic, Rat-legged, Ratted, Ravaged, Razzled, Reek-ho, Rendered, Rosy glow, Rubbered, Ruined, Saying hello to Mr Armitage, Scattered, Schindlers, Screwed, Scuttered, Shedded, Slaughtered, Sloshed, Smashed, Snatered, Snobbled, Sozzled, Spangled, Spannered, Spiffed, Spongelled, Squiffy, Steamin, Steampigged, Stocious, Stonkin, Tanked, Tashered, Tipsy, Trashed, Trollied, Troubled, Trousered, Twisted, Warped, Wasted, Wellied, With the fairies, Wrecked, Zombied.

It seems to me they're missing quite a few: Minkered, Pissed, Cunted, Tired and emotional, A little bit tipsy [©Marcus]; Escalatored [©Ian]