The A to Z of the Vauxhall Tavern
Q is for Queues
The Chill Out has become far too popular. I don't know how many people the Vauxhall is licensed for, but I'll wager it's about a hundred less than are packed in every Sunday.

Arriving after 5:30 virtually guarantees you'll have to wait outside, in the rain, till the show is over. Then it's one-in-one-out. Once you get in, join the queue for the coatcheck. Which intermingles with the queue for the bar. Holding your beer aloft, fight your way through the crowds and find a spot where you can see the show – preferably not behind the group of 7-foot-tall lagered-up bears. All that beer means you need a pee, so join the 5-minute queue for the gents'. Or the 15-minute queue for the ladies'. Learn to dance in an area of one-square foot, without actually moving any body parts. Finally, when you want to leave, there's that coatcheck queue again.

It's not as though this is a fancy West End club or anything - it's just a pub south of the river, for crying out loud!